"What you want, wants you," Peter Ragnar always says,
Yet I think identifying what we want is difficult. Too many have given up on their dreams, if indeed they ever knew them. My family was one of those who had survived the depression. Somewhere in their struggle to survive they became cautious and practical. No one talked about dreams or possibilities.
When it was time to decide what I wanted to be when I grew up, the options I knew about were limited and traditional: teacher, secretary, nurse, nun, medical technician, or housewife. Since I got good grades, I went to college (neither of my parents did but they believed education was the ticket up). After finding out I couldn't spell (there went secretary), and when I threw up in my Math final (there went medical technician) I was at a loss. It was by chance I took a Psychology course and loved it. I changed to a psychology major which filled my last summer and senior year. This was the first step to becoming an organizational consultant.
Still, no one asked about my dreams. Instead I focused on doing good work and focused on helping others have meaningful work. I did this well but I also got burned out. We need our dreams, they feed us.
But I've gotten wiser over the years and I've started listening to what my life is about. I've come to believe that each of us has a set of gifts and interests to bring to the world. And although many will tell us what we love doesn't matter, that it is impractical or is dangerously selfish, I think they're wrong.
Today I'm a believer in setting intentions rooted in our dreams. Fellow blogger Deb Call has written a lovely piece about questions to ask oneself to get in touch with your heart wisdom. Sitting quietly and reflecting is truly the only way to hear you heart's guidance.
Dreams are often the missing element when people are working to earn a living. I just finished Matthew Kelly's book, The Dream Manager. He writes:
"Most employees feel like they are being used. But if you have...their best interests at heart, then you will reverse that belief.
You can ignore people's dreams, but it will be at your peril...Dreams are invisible, but powerful...they keep everything going." from The Dream Manager, Beacon Publishing, 2007.
Mathew's consulting firm works with organizations to establish Dream Manager programs, where it is someone's responsibility to meet with employees and help them realize their dreams. He believes, and so do I, that loyalty based on working for a pension and good retirement is dead. Instead there will be:
"[A] new breed of loyalty...based upon an understanding between employees and companies of one another's purpose--to become the-best-version-of-themselves."
These days being the best version of myself fits. As it says on the little post-it notes my friend Marta sent me:
BE YOURSELF...
WHO ELSE IS BETTER QUALIFIED?